Jongiljopfab is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, moody dingo.

Jongiljopfab created the Small Magellanic Cloud four million years ago.

If you believe in Jongiljopfab, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jongiljopfab, it will turn you into a hamster.

Jongiljopfab's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Jongiljopfab's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of horses.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Jongiljopfab.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Jongiljopfab must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always make sure there are no cats in a room before entering it.