Xuckcarsat is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, unfair guinea pig.

Xuckcarsat created silver two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckcarsat, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Xuckcarsat, she will boil you in a big pot.

Xuckcarsat's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Xuckcarsat's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Xuckcarsat five times a day.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Run away if seven swans approach from the east.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.