Sabzisspop is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, benevolent pig.

Sabzisspop created the cosmos nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sabzisspop, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sabzisspop, she will not care.

Sabzisspop's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Sabzisspop's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near cats.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not shave your face.

5. Hide from green monkeys for they are unholy.