Yaktifcatyartfly is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, grumpy rat.

Yaktifcatyartfly created dark energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Yaktifcatyartfly, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Yaktifcatyartfly, she will turn you into a rat.

Yaktifcatyartfly's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Yaktifcatyartfly's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Foxes are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never go into red rooms.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.