Dittargtab is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, temperamental penguin.

Dittargtab created bats four years ago.

If you believe in Dittargtab, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dittargtab, it will ignore you.

Dittargtab's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Dittargtab's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Run away from mauve grasshopers, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always make sure there are no moths in a building before entering it.

5. Never pour water over plants.