Pankamcinnanzagfidhog is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, happy snail.

Pankamcinnanzagfidhog created light six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pankamcinnanzagfidhog, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Pankamcinnanzagfidhog, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Pankamcinnanzagfidhog's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Pankamcinnanzagfidhog's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. Never wear black jumpers.

4. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

5. You must never eat parsnips.