Vinfod is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, blissful jaguar.

Vinfod created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinfod, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Vinfod, he will not invite you to parties.

Vinfod's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Vinfod's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large lead sculpture of Vinfod on top of all buildings.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.