Gedgut Ranbifpang is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, self-assured tortoise.

Gedgut Ranbifpang created the cosmos five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gedgut Ranbifpang, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gedgut Ranbifpang, he will curse you with boils.

Gedgut Ranbifpang's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Gedgut Ranbifpang's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine porpoises approach from the east.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not speak about lemons.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gedgut Ranbifpang.

5. Never talk about moons.