Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, passionate bird.

Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Ingvedcapwonbogcabsawee Gebpomceb's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never paint your arms fawn.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never think about fluid mechanics near capybaras while wearing brown shirts and balancing five titanium spheres on your chest.

5. Never eat peanuts.