Staftifbad is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, blissful hippopotamus.

Staftifbad created the Sun nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Staftifbad, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Staftifbad, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Staftifbad's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Staftifbad's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not kill whales.

3. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a room before entering it.

4. Never jump in holy places.

5. Always help sick shrews.