Govtafwip is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, omniscient horse.

Govtafwip created the Andromeda Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Govtafwip, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Govtafwip, she will turn you into a puffin.

Govtafwip's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Govtafwip's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. You must pray to Govtafwip three times a day.

3. Never hurt moths.

4. Govtafwip must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not hurt frogs.