Himtiggam Kipsandxem is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, quiet lion.

Himtiggam Kipsandxem created an electron four million years ago.

If you believe in Himtiggam Kipsandxem, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Himtiggam Kipsandxem, she will turn you into a tree.

Himtiggam Kipsandxem's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Himtiggam Kipsandxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not keep eight squirrels in a large pit.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Retreat if four mice approach from the south.