Bifnilkim is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, passionate monkey.

Bifnilkim created the planet Saturn six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifnilkim, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bifnilkim, it will not care at all.

Bifnilkim's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Bifnilkim's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never leap in the presence of shrews.

3. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.