Gubhinrak is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, able faun.

Gubhinrak created Africa nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gubhinrak, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gubhinrak, it will not care.

Gubhinrak's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Gubhinrak's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Gubhinrak.

2. Put Gubhinrak first in all things.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Always help ducks.

5. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.