Gepbumtit is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, fast eagle.

Gepbumtit created a Higgs boson eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepbumtit, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gepbumtit, she will turn you into a plant.

Gepbumtit's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gepbumtit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not commit murder.