Mutbellfon is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, smart cobra.

Mutbellfon created a charm quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Mutbellfon, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Mutbellfon, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Mutbellfon's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Mutbellfon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Feed all hungry whales.

5. Retreat if six seals approach from the west.