Bestladflow Gembadnart is a god.

He takes the form of a small, emotional faun.

Bestladflow Gembadnart created water eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bestladflow Gembadnart, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bestladflow Gembadnart, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Bestladflow Gembadnart's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bestladflow Gembadnart's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate geese.

2. You must never eat rice.

3. Never hurt monkeys.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.