Gidgudlim is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, kind dugong.

Gidgudlim created the Milkyway three million years ago.

If you believe in Gidgudlim, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gidgudlim, she will turn you into a puffin.

Gidgudlim's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Gidgudlim's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Do not eat tomatoes.

4. Never feed carrots to capybaras while wearing mauve shorts.

5. Feed all hungry ants.