Omtdan Metwikgov is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, fussy dog.

Omtdan Metwikgov created the universe two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Omtdan Metwikgov, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Omtdan Metwikgov, it will destroy your home planet.

Omtdan Metwikgov's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Omtdan Metwikgov's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear magenta skirts.

2. Erect a large lead sculpture of Omtdan Metwikgov on top of all buildings.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never feed lemons to horses while wearing tights.

5. Never think about thermodynamics.
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