Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, intelligent cow.

Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid created Asia five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid, she will throw large rocks at you.

Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Arfdanvan Stafrowbab Quillzakgid must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Respect your elders.