Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, omniscient snake.

Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam created Asia seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam's Holy Commandments

1. Always help goats in need.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam loves voles, so they must be respected.

5. Xuckjennatzogtofbogflagkam loves bats, so they must be honoured.