Vonkripnak is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, all-powerful wombat.

Vonkripnak created gold two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkripnak, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vonkripnak, it will turn you into a plant.

Vonkripnak's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Vonkripnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. You must never eat carrots.

4. Run away from yellow cats, for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about fire.