Stikcib is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, grumpy donkey.

Stikcib created dark energy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Stikcib, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Stikcib, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Stikcib's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Stikcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat melons.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never feed coconuts to turtles while wearing magenta stockings.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always make sure there are no badgers in a building before entering it.