Farnpodtetti is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, conceited guinea pig.

Farnpodtetti created the Black Eye Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Farnpodtetti, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Farnpodtetti, he will not care at all.

Farnpodtetti's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Farnpodtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into turquoise rooms.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. You must never eat spinach.

5. Never pour water over plants.