Zimnullvon is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, merciless dog.

Zimnullvon created oxygen nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimnullvon, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Zimnullvon, it will refuse to believe in you.

Zimnullvon's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Zimnullvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair yellow.

2. Never eat bread.

3. Always help sheep in need.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not take Zimnullvon's name in vain.