Gangonhun is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, strong wren.

Gangonhun created tapeworms two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gangonhun, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gangonhun, he will turn you into a plant.

Gangonhun's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Gangonhun's Holy Commandments

1. Gangonhun must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

3. Run away from red bats, for they are unholy.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.