Wikstanlarg is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, happy crocodile.

Wikstanlarg created light seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikstanlarg, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Wikstanlarg, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Wikstanlarg's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Wikstanlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never laugh near whales.

3. Foxes are not to be trusted.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.