Somlenfon is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, weak snake.

Somlenfon created the Sombrero Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Somlenfon, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Somlenfon, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Somlenfon's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Somlenfon's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck turquoise.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Somlenfon must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not cook food in pots.