Stigdudquat is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, weak coyote.

Stigdudquat created energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigdudquat, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Stigdudquat, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Stigdudquat's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Stigdudquat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.

2. Erect a large iron sculpture of Stigdudquat on top of all buildings.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always help otters.

5. You must love Stigdudquat.