Yattflammat is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, almighty frog.

Yattflammat created the planet Earth seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yattflammat, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yattflammat, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Yattflammat's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Yattflammat's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if three tapirs approach from the west.

2. Never paint your face orange.

3. Put Yattflammat first in all things.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not hurt capybaras.