Nartfasnarl is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, caring unicorn.

Nartfasnarl created the Andromeda Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartfasnarl, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nartfasnarl, he will turn you into a rat.

Nartfasnarl's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Nartfasnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never wear pink shirts.

5. Always look after injured manatees.