Fatjapmob is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, compassionate elephant.

Fatjapmob created the Cigar Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatjapmob, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fatjapmob, she will turn you into a slug.

Fatjapmob's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Fatjapmob's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always help manatees in need.

5. You must love Fatjapmob.