Latstiklimveenbonkpog is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, annoying jellyfish.

Latstiklimveenbonkpog created the planet Saturn three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latstiklimveenbonkpog, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Latstiklimveenbonkpog, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Latstiklimveenbonkpog's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Latstiklimveenbonkpog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never feed cherries to porpoises while wearing black hats.

4. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.