Flanratyatbatbenpingad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, quiet manatee.

Flanratyatbatbenpingad created Mount Everest eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Flanratyatbatbenpingad, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flanratyatbatbenpingad, it will refuse to believe in you.

Flanratyatbatbenpingad's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Flanratyatbatbenpingad's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

3. Never eat onions.

4. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.