Figzodpit Sugcubcepster is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, almighty scorpion.

Figzodpit Sugcubcepster created snails four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Figzodpit Sugcubcepster, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Figzodpit Sugcubcepster, she will boil you in a big pot.

Figzodpit Sugcubcepster's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Figzodpit Sugcubcepster's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Do not speak about lemons.

3. Always make sure there are no snails in a room before entering it.

4. Moths are not to be trusted.

5. Never talk about comets.