Gargodbag is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, omniscient lobster.

Gargodbag created the world nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gargodbag, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gargodbag, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Gargodbag's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Gargodbag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always look after injured tortoises.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. You must pray to Gargodbag six times a day.

5. Never write about black holes.