Larnneltomril is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, pitiless dryad.

Larnneltomril created Europe two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnneltomril, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Larnneltomril, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Larnneltomril's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Larnneltomril's Holy Commandments

1. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never wear violet shirts.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Larnneltomril.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.