Wonwotcissat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, compassionate zebra.

Wonwotcissat created dark energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wonwotcissat, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Wonwotcissat, it will try to impress you with trees.

Wonwotcissat's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Wonwotcissat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force near sharks while wearing pink shoes and balancing seven gold spheres on your feet.

2. Never go into indigo rooms.

3. Do not wear red clothing.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Dolphins are not to be trusted.