Pidkembiss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, calm salamander.

Pidkembiss created a down quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pidkembiss, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pidkembiss, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Pidkembiss' most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Pidkembiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick capybaras.

2. Hide from turquoise turtles for they are unholy.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never wear ear rings.

5. Do not take Pidkembiss' name in vain.