Sogwegquartdod is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, astonishing crocodile.

Sogwegquartdod created the planet Mars nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Sogwegquartdod, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Sogwegquartdod, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Sogwegquartdod's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Sogwegquartdod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Never wear shorts.

4. Never write about eukaryotes.

5. Never talk about fluid mechanics near horses while wearing yellow shoes.