Bastrillfod Sternutyam is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, omnipotent hummingbird.

Bastrillfod Sternutyam created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastrillfod Sternutyam, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bastrillfod Sternutyam, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bastrillfod Sternutyam's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Bastrillfod Sternutyam's Holy Commandments

1. Learn nine new languages a year.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always help tapirs.

4. Never bounce in the presence of swans.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.