Teennatfun is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, resourceful owl.

Teennatfun created the planet Saturn five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Teennatfun, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Teennatfun, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Teennatfun's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Teennatfun's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Teennatfun.

3. Never hurt capybaras.

4. Never sit near great tits.

5. Never feed apples to pigs while wearing turquoise corsets.