Quilltapbiggup is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, humane naga.

Quilltapbiggup created everything that exists four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quilltapbiggup, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Quilltapbiggup, she will boil you in a big pot.

Quilltapbiggup's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Quilltapbiggup's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never wear kilts.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Quilltapbiggup loves voles, so they must be honoured.

5. Never talk about dark energy near snails while wearing black tights.