Sterflamhug is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, omniscient crab.

Sterflamhug created the Andromeda Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Sterflamhug, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sterflamhug, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Sterflamhug's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Sterflamhug's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink shorts.

2. Never hop in holy places.

3. Never feed nuts to manatees while wearing shirts.

4. Never talk about mice.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.