Natpangmis is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, compassionate sheep.

Natpangmis created the cosmos two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Natpangmis, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Natpangmis, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Natpangmis' most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Natpangmis' Holy Commandments

1. Always wear fawn.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never feed lots of peanuts to ants while wearing red dresses.

4. Natpangmis loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

5. Never talk about fire.