Nulkapbag is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, omniscient goblin.

Nulkapbag created the Tadpole Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Nulkapbag, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nulkapbag, it will be very sad.

Nulkapbag's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Nulkapbag's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nulkapbag.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Always treat snakes with great respect.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.