Fongaddum is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, ruthless hydra.

Fongaddum created the universe four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fongaddum, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fongaddum, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fongaddum's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Fongaddum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three platinum sculptures of Fongaddum on top of important buildings.

2. Do not wear silver on your body.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not hurt horses.

5. Never play with disobedient children.