Dunkiknad is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, egotistical cobra.

Dunkiknad created the Andromeda Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Dunkiknad, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dunkiknad, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Dunkiknad's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Dunkiknad's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed strawberries to great tits while wearing shoes.

2. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Dunkiknad on top of all buildings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Erect six lead sculptures of Dunkiknad on top of important buildings.

5. Never eat green fruit.