Sogkamweecettarpkon is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, tranquil newt.

Sogkamweecettarpkon created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Sogkamweecettarpkon, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Sogkamweecettarpkon, he will come to you in dreams.

Sogkamweecettarpkon's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Sogkamweecettarpkon's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never run near eagles.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never mention monkeys.

5. Never skip in the presence of whales.