Yartbunyart is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, competent octopus.

Yartbunyart created the Andromeda Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yartbunyart, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yartbunyart, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Yartbunyart's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Yartbunyart's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Erect three nickel sculptures of Yartbunyart on top of important buildings.

3. Always treat turtles with great respect.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.